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Bionic Fred

 
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Tearlach
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Joined: 04 Oct 2008
Posts: 2914

PostPosted: Mon Apr 14, 2014 12:05 am    Post subject: Bionic Fred Reply with quote

This is the tale of young Freddie Bloor,
Whose sexual equipment was jammed in a door,
By the time they had freed him, he didnít feel well,
For his poor private parts were all mangled to hell.

They rushed him to hospital the ambulance it flew,
But when they arrived, there was nowt that they could do,
What a sad blow for Fred, condemned without choice,
To a life without sex, and a high squeaky voice.

But lucky for Fred, so he wouldn't feel a fool,
Some bright spark suggested a bionic tool,
A smart new electric one made out of brass,
Though the batteries would have to be kept up his arse.

So newly equipped, and after a rest,
Fred thought he would put his new tool to the test,
So finding a woman, the nearest one handy,
Filled her with drink, and made her feel randy

The Girl without waiting put her hand in Fredís flies,
When she felt what was there she cried out in surprise,
"That's my bionic chopper, now lets have some fun",
"Cor blimey" she, said "It felt just like a gun''.

They both stripped off quick, and Fred entered her fast,
And turned up the speed knob and gave her full blast,
They clutched tight to each other as Fredís dick shook them more,
Then they shook off the bed and rolled onto the floor.

Now the pace hotted up and they started to choke,
As the air in the room became filled with blue smoke,
With a bang Fredís left bolIock shot into the air,
And the other went honketty-bonk down the stair.

So back for repair went Fred full of woe,
Was this how his sex life was destined to go?
A return to the Doctor at the end of each shag,
With a prick in his pocket and his bolIocks in a bag.

But they fixed young Fred up and made him manly again,
And they helped out the batteries with a flex for the main,
So if he can't get a girl now Fred doesn't cry,
Cos' he's AC / DC, and can go with a guy.
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